We're All Going On A Winter Holiday

It’s been a little while since we last blogged, but for very good reasons. I, Laurence, have been incommunicado, a village in Cuba (v.old joke). Actually, I stayed in one of Havana’s finest hotels, as depicted above.

There is no email or internet in Cuba, and even mobile phones are a rarity. When I did send a text, people stared at me and wondered what was the device I held in my hand. Many locals that I met had never seen a mobile phone that fitted in one’s palm.

And I, Maurice, have been indoors, recovering from a minor foot operation, with the help of my lady wife and a large number of boxed sets of classic TV shows and chocolates.

But now we’re back in the office, polishing Save The Last Dance For Me, and Birds of a Feather – Live, in advance of next year’s tours. The latest news, however, gives rise to some anxiety, re Birds. We have just heard that Linda Robson is going out to the jungles of Australia to take part in I’m A Conservative MP And I Want Some Publicity, the well known ITV bug-eating romp.

We love Linda and hope she comes back in one piece. But we must say she is the most unlikely candidate for a live on-air kangaroo testicle eating competition. We’ve always found Linda’s dietary preferences to be on the conservative side. When we first met her, she looked with extreme suspicion upon any piece of meat that hadn’t been grilled into cinder-like submission and her vegetable of choice was the baked bean.

We have no doubt that Linda has what it takes to put Nadine Dorries MP back in her box, and to win the public vote. But surely there must be an easier way to get a bit of winter sun. A fortnight’s camping holiday in Aleppo, perhaps?